Thursday, May 3, 2012

Racing Butterflies

I've promised myself approximately 983274932749823 times (remember, that's approximate) that I will be a little healthier. Sleep a little more, eat a little better, be a little more active. No massive changes, God knows I won't stick to them that way, just little things.

Given the blahs I've been experiencing lately (and yes, that's the official term) I've been extra motivated to just do something about it. So I've been trying to get to bed by like 10:30 (which in no way means I'm sleeping by then, I'm averaging 11 on that), not eat every piece of cake, cookie or brownie that passes into sight (which is a challenge, I assure you) and if nothing else I'm trying to walk for about 30 minutes a day.The walking is decently easy to accomplish since Alyssa and I will both go outside and walk around the Mount and chat. An hour flies by, no problem, it's like magic.

I do feel better when I manage to stick to it for more than a day or two. I'm releasing some pent up energy that's been hanging around for months. And the weather alone could change the world, with the warmth and sun. I love this time of year, I can break out a little.

I woke up to fantastic weather this morning, hot and kind of muggy, but the sun is out in all its glory. What else can I ask for? Feeling exceptionally motivated, I decided a bike ride needed to happen, and that was that. So, after much fussing and carrying on trying to get my bike out of the tangle that is our bike rack in the garage, and pumping up my tires I was on my way.

It was a really nice ride (except for the hills, I could do without them.) The lilacs are blooming like crazy, I love the way they smell.  But what I really enjoyed was seeing all the butterflies.

I've always loved butterflies. They're such beautiful, delicate little things. There's so much symbolism in such a simple, tiny creature. Something average and even ugly morphs into something beautiful, into a new life, a new state of being.

All I could think while I was riding around, huffing, puffing and sweating half to death, was how easy the butterflies make it look. They were passing in front of me constantly or flying up next to me. They were keeping pace with me- even if only for a moment- fluttering with almost no effort. Then they'd drop off and leave me, while I pushed on ahead.

8.5 miles and approximately 15,000 hills later (again, that's approximate) I finished a long, hot bike ride. And I feel really good, even as I'm typing this, on my floor, in front of my fan, trying to apologize to my knees. I feel good for the exercise I got, and being able to enjoy the great weather. I feel really peaceful, being able to ride along, and think and pray a little.

Overall, I just feel better. As I said in my last post, I've been feeling out of sorts lately. I'm getting back to normal, I'm happy for that. A lot is happening. And sooner than I know I can handle, I'm going to find myself like the butterflies- changing, onto the next phase.

But, that's part of life, it's why I'm here. To stay for awhile, to grow, to change, to come to the end ready to fly.

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