August....already?

It's ridiculous how fast the time flies sometimes. Forget that it feels like just yesterday that I graduated college and my summer started, it also feels like just yesterday that I was gearing up for my freshman year to start.
 
It's weird, not getting myself ready to start another year at Canisius. It was always a mixed feeling of excitement and apprehension once August began and the countdown to move-in started. Buying stuff for my dorm/apartments, getting school supplies, spending a fortune on books (ick). I'd always be so excited to get back to the city I love, and seeing my friends again that I live so far away from. I'd be excited at the thought of the new classes I would be taking, and seeing my favorite professors. I'd promise myself at the start of every year that I would be totally on top of all my work and be the best student ever-but that would wear off by the third week of class when I was sick of reading and papers haha!

And then the countdown to the end of the semester would begin. When the newness and excitement would wain and I'd be itching to make it through another semester of late nights filled with papers and reading, on top of a hectic work schedule. My stress level would start to rise, and I just couldn't wait to hit that finish line, blast through all my final papers and projects, and get that reward of my grades at the end. Somehow, still in tact.

I loved being a college kid, stress and all. I loved every moment of it, but I did always push myself to the next days/week/month/semester way too fast. It flew by me, and sometimes I didn't stop enough to really appreciate the greatest time of my life, because the stress was just too high some weeks to focus on anything else.

So here I am now, both longing for that feeling of gearing up for a new year at Canisius, but at the same time relieved that I don't have to deal with the stress of another academic year. Not right now anyway.

I'm gearing up for something totally new and exciting. I'm moving onto the next big step in my life in just 19 days, and I'm moving somewhere brand new to me. I'll once again pack up most of my life into my little red car, and drive westward toward another new beginning. This time though, I'll bypass the city I have grown to love so much for the last 4 years, and continue two hours more onto my new home for the next year at the Mount. It's going to be an emotional day, I know I'll probably cry more than once on that long car ride, as my thoughts race and I imagine what's in store for me, and I'm always sad to say by to my family and my pup at the end of another extended time home.

It's surreal to think that it's only 19 days away. The big move is almost staring me in the face. I'm excited, I'm scared, I'm nervous, and I'm not yet ready for my summer to be done. I pray the next 19 days take their time. As much as I'm sick of work, and can't wait until my last shift on the 16th, I also don't want to wish away these final days home with my family and my dogs.

I need to remind myself to slow down and enjoy the moment more often. It's something I'd like to work on in the coming months and year. I don't need to wish my time away, it's marching on fast enough on its own. Instead of watching the time pass, willing it to go just a little quicker to reach the end of the work day, or whatever, I need to watch everything else going on around me. Everyday is its own, and I need to savor that day, because no matter how good or bad a day, or an entire week might feel, I'll never get those moments back.

So here's my promise to myself to enjoy the coming days as much as possible, work included (haha!), and to stop focusing on that number of days left. I don't need to countdown the days, they're doing that for me on their own. My job is to just enjoy what they bring.


Peace,
Carrie